Lapis Mother
Posted in Jewellery on 12/15/2009 12:09 am by admin
Please Critique Poem I wrote?!?
no title yet Suggestions?
A leather cover groans
Crisp white pages ruffle
I am drawn in
Quick soaring over an ocean
It is of deepest lapis
I shy from a raging sun
Escaping its wrathful clutches
Plunging into watery abyss
Creatures of myth swimming free
I need not move myself
My mind carries me
Darkness fills deepest caverns
I am fascinated and amused
By this world of lingering imagination
My own delusion is enthused
This land of far is so traquil
Yet powers of old rise unseen
Secrets charged, never to be told
Loosed by ones who’d have them seen
Plague and pestilence soon decend
Shadows in my eyes blur the pages
I foresee a finish draws nearer
Feel that I’ve been gone ages
I know there’s a story yet to end
My need for adventure is absurd
A call from my mother…
Left to linger, not quite the last word
“Loosed”???
Written really well, i thought. If you cant think of a title, you should just use the first line of the poem as your title.. that’s what i do with my poems, and thats what is generally done for poems that no one knows what it is titled…. eg “Let me not to the marriage of true minds” – Shakespeare otherwise known as sonnet 116
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